Episode 9 – Let’s Stop Calling it Failure and Call it What it is; Growth

Todd Bertsch: 0:06

Welcome back to the Bold Podcast. I’m Todd B, your guide on this exciting journey of personal growth and leadership, where my guests and I will share personal stories from our transformational journeys of how small changes can lead to massive results. You’ll discover tips on overcoming obstacles, setting and achieving goals, building lasting habits, living a happy, healthy and positive life, and so much more. If you’re ready to cultivate a growth mindset and become the best version of yourself, then let’s ignite your growth today. Today, we’re diving into the topic of failure. This can be a tough one to talk through, as it instantly brings on negative emotions for many people. The word failure makes people cringe. I know it does for me so why don’t we just call it what it truly is growth? That’s really what this is all about. This mindset shift took me a lot of years to learn, but once I made the shift, it changed my whole career trajectory. So let’s shake off that fear and get into why failures or mistakes are not just okay, they’re required. First, I want to share this famous quote from FDR the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Remember that one. Look, here’s the thing Most people aren’t afraid to fail. They’re afraid of others watching them and seeing them fail. It’s the judgment of failure that crushes people. So why do mistakes and failures matter so much? Well, mistakes are like the plot twists in a story of your life. They’re unexpected and usually unwanted, but they add that depth, that character development and, let’s be honest, they make things a hell of a lot more interesting. Without mistakes, we would just be coasting along, never learning or growing. Each mistake is a gift and an opportunity. You learn what doesn’t work, which gets you closer to what does work. Plus, mistakes humble us and remind us that we’re all just human, learning as we go. If everything we did was perfect, we’d have a tough time getting motivated to keep growing.

Todd Bertsch: 2:28

I was a so-called perfectionist for many years and it was a major hurdle in my life and my career. Why? Because I was so focused on the end game, the result, that I couldn’t accept anything less. Sound familiar? Hey, I was a product of the 70s and the 80s. We were conditioned to get perfect grades, to be the winner in every sport. There was no participation trophy for us. If you lost, you got nothing. I struggled with this for many years, for most of my life, and I still have my moments, but I’m an avid learner and open to new concepts, and this attitude has given me a new outlook, and it can for you too. Look, what I’ve learned is that there are no mistakes in life, only lessons. We are built for this. We crave this. This is how we grow.

Todd Bertsch: 3:23

Failure is intertwined with success, like yin and yang. You need them both to survive and thrive. So I want to share this quote by Bruce Lee with you.

Todd Bertsch: 3:35

The good life is a process, not a state of being. It’s a direction, not a destination. You have to learn to embrace the journey of failure. If you don’t, you’ll limit your ability to create, innovate and take risks. Remember the old saying no risk, no reward. Well, it’s true. The essence of risk is failure. No failure, no success. Call them whatever you want Lessons, mistakes, screw-ups, whatever makes you feel good, but in the end, these imperfections are the essence of evolution. If you cannot accept this, you will not grow or succeed. You’ll be scared, afraid and never take a risk. And at what cost. You may miss out on some of life’s greatest experiences or, better yet, your own calling. In life. You cannot afford to dwell on the past. What’s been done is done. Learn and move on. Don’t get caught up in the failure trap of negativity.

Todd Bertsch: 4:39

One concept that has helped me through this is Buddha’s concept. I learned this from Marshall Goldsmith’s book the Earned Life. While the concept may seem a little bit out there, if you sit with it for a moment, it totally makes sense. So let’s unpack it. So when Buddha said every breath I take is a new me, he wasn’t speaking metaphorically, he meant it literally a new me. He wasn’t speaking metaphorically, he meant it literally. Buddha was teaching that life is a progression of discrete moments of constant reincarnation from a previous you to the present you. At one moment, through your choices and actions, you may experience pleasure, happiness, sadness or fear. But that specific emotion doesn’t linger. With each breath it alters, eventually vanishing. It was experienced by a previous you. Whatever you hope will happen in your next breath or the next day or the next year, will be experienced by a different you the future you. The only iteration of you that matters is the present you who has just taken a breath.

Todd Bertsch: 5:49

I want to share another great quote from Shannon Lee’s book about her father, Bruce Lee “Be Water, my friend, where she learns about her father’s life. So here’s the quote Wow, that is so powerful, right? Wow, that is so powerful right. I’ve started to embrace this philosophy and it changed how I think about my risks and failures, or past mistakes. I’ve made so many mistakes and have failed so many times, but each time it’s made me stronger in who I am today. It helps me build grit and resilience, which has allowed me to take more risks and put myself out there. Just like this podcast, I’ll share with you some of my personal stories of failure. Maybe you can relate to these.

Todd Bertsch: 6:43

So, back when I was a teenager, breakdancing was a big thing for me. I was obsessed with breakdancing. It was a huge movement at the time and I had been practicing for a while and I decided to enter this local dance competition. I thought I would do well. I was pretty good. I failed miserably, but I wiped away my tears and was determined to be better. I trained day and night, every single day, for two years straight. I started entering more competitions and I ended up being invited to dance with the top group in the area. This was truly one of my most cherished times in my life. If I would have never tried or taken a risk or given up when I failed, I would have missed out on this amazing experience. Failures matter.

Todd Bertsch: 7:36

When I was in my 20s, I entered a bodybuilding competition. I was in great shape. I had a coworker who competed in bodybuilding and he said hey, I’ll train you, I’ll take you through this. I had never done it before. I’m like okay, I’ll try it. And we went through this training for about six months very strict diet, workout routines, tanning, dyeing my skin, shaving every hair on my body. It was a lot of work. Come showtime, I had become so fit that I lost all my original muscle. Hell, my trunks didn’t even fit anymore. Out of eight others, I placed seventh. I was really embarrassed. Lots of my friends came to watch me and they made fun of me for years about my trunks, and losing. This was a tough one to overcome. I keep the trophy in my office as a reminder.

Todd Bertsch: 8:24

What I learned later is that I had the courage to try something new, to get out of my comfort zone and to respect the craft. It humbled me so fast forward 20 years later and I start my own business, and these past mistakes and failures and lessons gave me the courage to take yet another risk on myself. And so I did, 15 years into my business and I could write a book about all the mistakes I’ve made in my business. That life and business is not perfect, will never be and should not be. I have finally learned to embrace the journey, the journey of failure and growth. Look guys, mistakes aren’t the end of the world. They’re just the beginning of a new chapter.

Todd Bertsch: 9:12

Even the most successful people have face-planted a time or two before they were truly a big success. Though it’s not talked about or celebrated enough, there have been lots of failures for these people. Again, it’s all part of the journey. Walt Disney, for instance his first business went bankrupt after two years. Then he tried acting and failed. He had many failures before becoming the Walt Disney icon that we know today. Bill Gates same thing. His first business was recording traffic information. It failed and we know where he is now. Can you imagine if he never got back up and dusted himself off? Maybe windows would never have been created?

Todd Bertsch: 9:55

Oprah has failed several times. She was fired from her first job as a news anchor. She made several failed investments, including a restaurant and a movie studio. Her own network even struggled to gain viewership and turn a profit. Each one of these famous people learned from their failures and turned them into opportunities for growth.

Todd Bertsch: 10:18

These are inspiring stories of grit and resilience and putting yourself out there. So what happens if you never experience failure? Think about all those young kid actors who achieved so much success right from the start. They never had a chance to even experience failure. That’s all they knew was success. Once that ride was done, most of them struggled and spiraled out of control. This is why mistakes matter. We need it to build resiliency. One of my favorite movies of all time and my favorite soundtrack is Rocky. I couldn’t go through an episode on failure without bringing Rocky into this, so his quote from the movie says it all you, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.

Todd Bertsch: 11:19

Look, guys, this can apply to many different things. It can even apply to your leadership roles, whether that role is a manager, director, coach or parent. These all apply. This approach will lead to an organizational success. Look, employees want to be challenged and grow. This is what fires off those endorphins that keep us happy and excited to come to work each day. By having this culture that embraces failure. This will lead to success. This is also a great retention tool. Eliminating quiet quitting. Your employees will stay engaged.

Todd Bertsch: 12:02

Embracing a failing fast and failing forward philosophy can provide many benefits, like more learning opportunities, more collaboration and more risk-taking, which leads to more innovation, trust and better communication. Encourage your team to get out of their comfort zone and to create some tension. This is when we do our best work. It’s what we all crave. This is when we do our best work. It’s what we all crave. These are all big wins.

Todd Bertsch: 12:49

So, in summary, first, don’t be afraid to fail. Step out of your comfort zone and analyze what happened, what went wrong, what can you learn from it. And finally, don’t take yourself too seriously. Laugh it off, share your story and move on. Take a breath. It’s a new. You Don’t beat yourself up. Give yourself grace and celebrate your wins, even if they are small wins. The fact that you tried is a win.

Todd Bertsch: 13:05

Your mistakes make you interesting, relatable and resilient. Own them, learn from them and let them propel you to greater heights. Failure is not having the courage to try, so get out there and fail Until next time. Keep those mistakes coming and keep growing my friends. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. You are on your way to growth, transformation and joy. If you find this episode helpful, please like and share with your friends and, by all means, please leave us a review. You can also view the show notes and subscribe to the bullet newsletter at toddbertsch. com. Remember, real change takes time. Start small and watch that growth take shape.